Happy Make a Bunch of People Feel Bad Day

Scan of a Valentine greeting card dated 1909. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Valentine’s Day is always so conflicting for me.  I’m in love and being in love is a great thing.  But it’s certainly not the only thing.

I remember how bad Valentine’s Day used to make me feel when I was single.  It was like most of the world was celebrating something I wasn’t doing at that moment.  Not that I couldn’t or wouldn’t, but just wasn’t doing right now.  Sometimes I didn’t even want to be doing it, the love thing; but on Valentine’s Day that felt wrong.

So, I always fear celebrating Valentine’s Day.  Not because I feel bad for non-lovers, but I worry that there will be celebrations of other things a LOT of other people, but not everyone, has done.

Things where I’d fall into the “haven’t done” group.  Like “We’ve Watched Star Wars Day,” or “We Can Eat Spicy Food Without Crying” day.

Worst would be a “We’ve Been To Disneyworld” day.  I know, most people have been to Disneyworld, but I haven’t and I’m a little touchy about it.

I mean it’s not like I’m not good enough to go to Disneyworld.  I could go tomorrow if I wanted to.  But I’m focusing on other things right now, you know?

On “We’ve Been to Disneyworld Day,” I might even send out cards to people I knew who have been.  Because I’m happy for them, it’s great, whatever.

Of course I’d send cards to the kids I know.  Even though they have no idea what the true magic of Disney is, even if they say they’ve been there.  Whatever.

Really, though, I’d have to have an anti-Disney party with other bitter people who haven’t visited the Magic Kingdom. We’d put a cute “Mouse Poison” sign on a bottle of Jack Daniels and do shots while we discussed how stupid going to Disneyworld is.

My arms would be crossed and I’d squint a little and tell everyone,  “Like I want to ride a Monorail.  I had Mono once, no thank you.  Plus, Mickey’s a rodent, you know.  A rodent who wears gloves but not shirts.  What’s up with that?  I do not need that in my life right now.”

Everyone would nod solemnly in agreement.

So, anyway, have a Happy Valentine’s Day if that tickles your fancy.  If not, cool.

To my dear husband, I love you lots and lots and can’t wait to drink wine and eat food and chocolate with you and the kids tonight.

(I actually prefer to celebrate February 15th, known as “All The Chocolate in the World is 50% Off Day.”)